Mom. I wasn’t what you think.

I wish you could see my hurt. Kiss all my ouchies away. My sensitivity to words made me a fussy impossible one sometimes… sure ….I bet I was hard to deal with but I could never tell you how deserted I felt every single time you turned  on that tv when I needed someone to talk to or dismissed me when I was trying to tell you something. I needed someone who cared enough to ask me how my day went … Someone who cared enough to notice how lonely I always was. I couldn’t put into words what I needed at that time so I did what I knew how to help me self soothe…cry, get on your nerves , talk back, then later sleep around, do drugs drink and throw parties at home while you were at work (all unbeknownst to you🎮👾🚬🍻🍸🍾). I was saying CATCH ME!!! NOTICE ME!!! I AM NOT OKAY. Sucks I took so long and suffered so much to finally ask you for love and acceptance. Most of all coming clean.  I’m not perfect. Neither are you (you tend to get diarrhea of the mouth when you’re angry which is toxic to me).I love you any way. I always will.

Moral of the story

walk away when your kids piss you off.

Dont leave them unattended too long engage talk to them

You don’t know how that one to five minutes of ranting can scar someone. Not worth the instant gratification trust me.

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